4 Tips for When You’re Terrified of Childbirth

Advertisment

Once the excitement and overwhelm of that positive pregnancy test wears off a little, most new moms start to think about giving birth.

It’s hard to imagine, isn’t it? Pushing a baby out of your vagina.

Or if you have a planned C-section the idea of a doctor making a cut in your body to lift your baby out can be equally terrifying.

Being terrified of giving birth, no matter how you plan to do it, is so normal.

And it’s important to remember that feeling afraid doesn’t mean you can’t do it. You can do this.

But one of the best ways to prepare for a positive birth experience is to start working on that fear.

Instead of hiding it away and letting it build, look at it closely. Sit with it. And learn some simple techniques for accepting and releasing fear so that you can feel confident about birth.

You might even be able to feel excited about giving birth!

To help you on your way, here are 4 things you can do to deal with your fears about birth.

1. Fill Your Life With Positive Birth Stories

From a young age, girls in our culture are told awful stories about birth.

The older women in our lives don’t mean to scare us.

But it’s so normal to joke about how terrible birth is, and to warn young women about the terrors in store for them.

So much so that the idea of birth being absolutely terrible and scary is ingrained into us.

The result is that the majority of first time moms are really terrified of giving birth.

Don’t listen to any more negative birth stories.

You can start to change how you feel about birth by listening to, watching, and reading stories about positive and empowering births.

The Internet is great for this! Search for positive birth stories on YouTube and you’ll find plenty of inspiration.

Absorbing these stories will help to shift your subconscious understanding of birth.

You will begin to believe that birth can be a good, loving, and powerful experience for you, your baby, and even your birth partner.

2. But Talk About Your Fears, Too

Taking in lots of uplifting stories about birth is really good for you. But that doesn’t mean you should pretend your fears don’t exist.

Choose a couple of people who you feel comfortable with and share your thoughts and feelings with them.

Tell them what you’re scared of, no matter how silly you think it sounds.

Try to choose people who will listen and respect your feelings without adding their own fears on top.

Sometimes just saying something out loud can make it less scary.

If you don’t feel comfortable opening up in this way to your friends, partner or family, you can ask your doctor or midwife to refer you to a pregnancy counselor.

Or you could sign up for a hypnobirthing course or prenatal class where you’ll be able to chat in a supportive setting with no judgments.

3. Try Hypnobirthing

Hypnobirthing is a kind of self-hypnosis that is specifically for labor and delivery.

Don’t worry, it’s not the kind of hypnosis you see on TV!

You will be consciously aware of everything you are doing at all times, and you definitely won’t start doing things out of your control.

Actually, it’s the opposite because it will help you to feel more in control.

Hypnobirthing is an effective way of preparing for birth and for managing pain naturally during labor.

It includes visualization, breathing techniques and deep relaxation that you can practice while you’re pregnant.

By the time you go into labor, you’ll know how to use these exercises to stay calm and confident.

It’s a very positive way to approach birth.

You will focus on the processes of breathing and relaxing to move your baby down through the birth canal gently and smoothly.

The visualizations will help you to stay focused and peaceful.

It’s also a great way to feel connected with your baby before birth.

You can try hypnobirthing by using audio downloads, online courses, or in-person classes, and courses with a certified teacher.

4. Prepare Your Body for Labor

Finally, preparing your body for the pressures of childbirth can help to soothe your fears.

If you feel fit, strong, and confident that you can move around with ease even into late pregnancy, it will be easier to imagine that your body can handle birth (which it absolutely can!).

Think of it this way: labor is an intense, and sometimes very long, strenuous physical activity. It’s about endurance.

You wouldn’t go and run a marathon without training first. So it makes sense to train for labor too.

That doesn’t mean going out and running ten miles a day.

If you’re already physically fit and your doctor gives you the go-ahead, you can maintain your exercise routines with some pregnancy modifications.

But if you’re not fit yet, it’s never too late to start.

Prenatal yoga, walking every day, and swimming are all safe ways to strengthen and stretch your muscles ready to give birth.

Do what you can; if you feel very sick or unwell during pregnancy, don’t push it.

But incorporate small exercises into each day.

To prepare your body for breathing through contractions, try this simple exercise that you can do a few times a day almost anywhere:

Stand with your back flat against a wall, and then bend your knees into a squat, keeping your back against the wall.
You can bend your knees more to increase the intensity.
Hold this squat for 20 seconds, then straighten your legs to rest for 10 seconds, and repeat.
Build up to hold the squat for 1 minute, and then 2 minutes. Take deep steady breaths the whole way through.